I come across a dog. Usually, walking on the sidewalk. The both of us, frequently. I bend down, say something like, “Whooz a moo moo goo?” and skritch his neck. What’s the point of this? This is how I get in your head.

Stacey Campfield, Tennessee Senator Behind ‘Don’t Say Gay’ Bill, On Bullying, AIDS And Homosexual ‘Glorification’
HuffPo | Michelangelo Signorile

In an often belligerent and sarcastic tone, GOP State Senator Stacey Campfield, the man who spearheaded Tennessee’s “Don’t Say Gay” bill — which would ban discussion in schools of “sexual orientation other than heterosexuality”– lashed out at arguments against his bill by comparing homosexuality to bestiality . .

What makes Stacey tick? How do you think his brain works? Let’s find out:

On bullying and suicides by gay teens, including two teens in Tennessee in recent months:

“That bullying thing is the biggest lark out there.”

Remember the time you and your girlfriend dressed up as waiters and served trays of flowers to riders on the subway? That was a lark. Those were heady days. Remember the time when you punched a stranger in the face because he had a lisp? That was notable, too.

“There are sexually confused children who could be pushed into a lifestyle that I don’t think is appropriate with them and it’s not for the norm for society, and they don’t know how they can get back from that. I think a lot of times these young teens and young children, they find it very hard on themselves and unfortunately some of them commit suicide.”

Stacey (smash fondle) knows what kinda sex is “appropriate with them.” Also, he’s well-informed as to what’s “the norm for society.” At some point, this sex stuff should probably get all personal. When it does, and then people tell me what turns them on, I’ll just believe it. At most, yuck. I’m not equipped to say anything about how you choose to poop, either. My sex life is like velvet across an opera planet. Darn, or boom.

On why only heterosexuality should be discussed in schools:

“I just think there are situations where some kids maybe sexually unsecure [sic] in themselves or sexually confused and don’t necessarily know clearly what direction they are.”

What direction they are? There are no directions. That’s the point that Stacey (tickle) would drive home. There is heterosexuality. Period. He doesn’t even recognize his own bullshit.

“If someone, a person of influence, says maybe you’re gay, maybe you should explore those things — maybe the child, who is young and impressionable, says maybe I am gay.”

And then it sticks. Like a bad paint job. Scrub all you like, but you’re gonna want a penis in your rear end the rest of your life. Shoot.

“[Homosexuals] do not naturally reproduce.”

Tell that to Merv Griffin.

“It has not been proven that it is nature. It happens in nature, but so does beastiality.”

My dog wangs the vacuum cleaner. It does little for his self esteem, so who’s the victim? Hmm? Would bestiality be something that only humans, by definition, do? Seems ‘nature’ is something left to both an elite and a primordial bunch. Unlike homosexuality, which is universal.

“That does not make it right or something we should be teaching in school.”

And there it is. If we accept people, we teach their sex practices. Gah.

It’s a Yahoo! article, but the synopsis delivers.

Low IQ & Conservative Beliefs Linked to Prejudice
LiveScience.com | By Stephanie Pappas

. . The research finds that children with low intelligence are more likely to hold prejudiced attitudes as adults. These findings point to a vicious cycle, according to lead researcher Gordon Hodson, a psychologist at Brock University in Ontario. Low-intelligence adults tend to gravitate toward socially conservative ideologies, the study found. Those ideologies, in turn, stress hierarchy and resistance to change, attitudes that can contribute to prejudice, Hodson wrote in an email to LiveScience.

Hello, Dad. Rest in peace.

As suspected, low intelligence in childhood corresponded with racism in adulthood. But the factor that explained the relationship between these two variables was political: When researchers included social conservatism in the analysis, those ideologies accounted for much of the link between brains and bias.

People with lower cognitive abilities also had less contact with people of other races.

“This finding is consistent with recent research demonstrating that intergroup contact is mentally challenging and cognitively draining, and consistent with findings that contact reduces prejudice,” said Hodson, who along with his colleagues published these results online Jan. 5 in the journal Psychological Science.

The “Definer of Civilization” never met civilization? This is a scandal.

Four police officers in the city of East Haven, Connecticut, were arrested Tuesday under suspicion of systematically harassing and abusing the town’s Latino citizens.

In an interview with Mayor Joe Maturo, a reporter from New York’s WPIX asked him what he’d do for the allegedly abused community “today.” The mayor’s response: “I might have tacos when I go home, I’m not quite sure yet.”

Here’s the comment, along with subsequent statements from the now-infamous mayor.

You can see where Joe’s sympathies lie. No matter how hard he tries, he can’t bring himself to admit he’s acted like an ass. It’s obvious why the feds would need to come in and clean out a racist police department: the mayor doesn’t care. Pity the unfortunate people who have to put up with the likes of East Haven cops and Mayor Maturo.

Here’s a strange, sad bit of news.

A woman who defied a driving ban on female motorists in Saudi Arabia has died in a car crash.

Another was hurt in the crash in the only country in the world where females are banned from getting behind the wheel . .

They were in a four-wheel drive on Saturday evening in the northern Hael province when the accident happened.

‘One woman was immediately killed and her companion who was driving the car was hospitalised after she suffered several injuries’ police spokesman Abdulaziz al-Zunaidi told AFP.

How does news like this strike you? A tragic end for a brave person? Saudi Arabia remains a f*cked up nation? You hope her death be received with some kudos in the Arab world?

Those sentiments would be far from the minds of conservatives:

Those geniuses are thinking, “What a typical chick.”

Women, you know how they are. They’re a certain tragic, comical way. It’s true.

I would double-check Vox Day’s facts. Pretty much anyone who calls himself a “Superintelligence” on the banner of his crappy blog deserves as much, but what a chore. Where’s the official list of “female pioneers”? Once I find that, I guess I could compose and compare actuarial death tables against those of “women who are actually trying to commit suicide.” Right. Also: the driver survived, and that roundly defeats the post. Still, women are lame.

The Rock n’ Roll rebel, takin’ it to the man:

When asked about Romney’s position on immigration, Gingrich said that deporting all undocumented immigrants is unrealistic.

“You have to live in a world of Swiss bank accounts and Cayman Island accounts and making $20 million for no work, to have some fantasy this far from reality,” Gingrich said.

What do island tax paradises have to do with Mexican immigrants? Newt Gingrich, that’s what. He’s winning, duh. He’s just burning, doing the Newtron dance.

As everybody’s noted lately, these attacks are working beautifully. Would Mitt care to fight back? Well, no. Why not? Because, in the very fancy parlance of the highest part of my guessing intellect, he’s a pussy. Gosh Newthro. Can’t play fair, can you? That’s on you, buddy.

Should Mittens grow some hair, there would be plenty of ways to skin a pest like Gingrich, one figures. This would not be one of them:

Look at that, will you. Can you imagine the luck? Turns out that Tagg . . wait, Tagg? [Tagg? Meet Track. Josh? Meet Willow. Welcome to Red Shoe Diaries cosplay. Mimosas up front, musk oil in the back.] Tagg Romney wandered past the liveried laundry workers to find Dad . . washing the Four Season’s sheets. Fates collide, or what? Good thing Tugger carries a decent iPhone/Nikon camera and tripod.

What a bold stroke from a zillion dollar campaign for the top job on the planet. Here Mitt stands in a starched white shirt, greying sideburns and all, pouring a tiny box of soap into a machine. This is a scene familiar to any of us stuck in $500 suites for weeks on end. Just a regular semi-billionaire, washing his wife’s bras. 23 shades of ecru.

My gob is smacked. What the hell is wrong with this man?

Romney happily explained the image to NBC News, “We do our laundry at least once a week, because we’ll be on the road for 30 straight days. Who else do you think is going to do our laundry?”

The laundry staff of the hotel? Or have we gone mad? Living in an eleven ampersand hotel, replete with the struggling working class cleaning filthy sheets, toilets and BVDs, he can’t allow them to touch a Mittens shirt? The Romney family tree could faint. Weasels could gnaw the Mexican roots.

The campaign may not have thought this through, I think. I’m sure the staff could manage doing Romney laundry without wiping their c*cks all over it. I’m also sure Mitt washes his own jeans because he’s a cheap bastard. The man’s as unlike the country he’d like to rule as perhaps a candidate can get.

Meanwhile:

“Now, the banks aren’t bad people. They’re just overwhelmed right now,” Romney said. “They’re overwhelmed with a lot of things.”

I don’t imagine anyone will take note of that sentiment.

NRO’s John Derbyshire with more of his reader e-mail. Here we go again. More misogyny to spread around, huzzah, just less of it Derb’s.

I’ve been theorizing a bit about the psychological forces at play in the vast right-wing world turning away from Mitt Romney and toward the “definer of civilization,” Newt Gingrich. How about we now listen to the people themselves? The fresh fans of Newt? Why they have embraced him? Here we go. And thank you, kind reader, for not sending me crap like this:

Derb:

[...]

I also think you hit on something in last week’s Radio Derb episode when you said that Newt has won the “bitter ex-husband” constituency. So the sanctimonious “marriage is sacred” crowd thinks Newt’s affairs are unacceptable. You have to wonder what world these people live in where they have never been in a relationship with a pain-in-the-butt female. Lots of things can happen after you commit to someone. They let themselves go, get fat, etc. These broads can drain you emotionally and physically with their endless demands and grievances. People change over time, and divorce is a messy business, especially when there’s money involved. Affairs are biologically natural, when one is separated from their mate for a significant period of time. They are even more natural for the male, whose biological goal in most respects is to impregnate as many females as possible, no?

So Newt the “broads” dumper is a feel-good candidate. His story’s the same as any regular guy in American life. We bang chicks until they start putting on pounds and begin griping about everything, and then what? We do what we gotta do. He’s classic.

One other reason I’m inclined to root for Newt is that he just makes for such a great villain. His narcissism, grandiosity and megalomania have all the makings of a bombastic antagonist, perhaps in the mold of someone like Drax from Moonraker. Even his name, “Newt” lends itself to this narrative (a salamander?) I could easily see him as one of the Alien leaders from V — the original miniseries (1983 version, not the crappy remake.)

There you have it: if you’re into sci-fi and misogyny, and think narcissism is underrated, you’ve gotta go with Gingrich.

. . though he’ll probably kill a few children in an attempt at world domination. Still, you gotta love a guy who parks his car under a volcano.

I wish I could be sillier about this, but I can’t. The takedown is sad: Barack Obama, seemingly normal person, has somehow run away with conservatives’ balls. They’ve tried to oppose him, hate him, belittle him, recast him, to call him a n*gger over and over, but how has he reacted? With a lotta nothing. He never notices. And just look at the pompous son of a bitch. He’s actually favored to win. It’s as if they, hellish racism and all, never existed.

But Gingrich? The disgusting mistress-juggling, ethics-breaking, black-baiting troll? Now there’s someone who would hump Obama’s goat. Hell, just look what he’s doing to Romney — it’s practically a crime. And it’s been easy. Newt will drive the snotty professor to epilepsy, they hope. Comments to follow:

One can’t help but be impressed by the bit of campaign pop culture Newt’s invented. He’s got a big hit on his hands: “Just A Guy” b/w “The Man Who’ll Shoot Uppity Menace.” It’s the sound of today, apparently. Mitt has no familiarity with either of these tunes, so he’s all squaresville.

I’m not in the habit of reading Andrew Sullivan. Many people are, and that’s fine. When I come across a post like this old one, it makes me less inclined to read him in the future. This new post, however, is spot on.

The Republican Establishment is Rush Limbaugh, Roger Ailes, Karl Rove, and their mainfold products, from Hannity to Levin. They rule on the talk radio airwaves and on the GOP’s own “news” channel, Fox. They have never quite reconciled themselves to Romney since he represents a gray blur in a stark Manichean universe they have created for more than a decade now. In this universe, there is only black and white. There is only them and us. Anyone who diverges an iota from this schematic is speaking without a microphone in front of a revving airplane engine.

Manichean is the word, and Sullivan’s right to use it. Politics to them is all fiery light and utter darkness, and the conservatives choose light. Those who won’t gravitate to Limbaugh and Rove’s sunshine are anti-American, anti-Jeffersonian and anti-Christian evil. Talk and act like Sean Hannity, or they’ll stomp you into the ground.

The government getting involved in healthcare isn’t a little socialist, it’s the Euro-cultist plague destroying the Western world. The media speaking of income inequality isn’t class consciousness, it’s exactly the class warfare Marx fashioned to destroy the United States. There’s little more that traditional intellectuals and historians can take before they pick up their rifles. Read their Constitution, ferchrissakes.

How’s a ‘moderate’ like Romney supposed to survive in this atmosphere?

This now is the party of Palin and Gingrich, animated primarily by hatred of elites, angry at the new shape and color of America, befuddled by a suddenly more complicated world, and dedicated primarily to emotion rather than reason. That party is simply not one that can rally behind a Mitt Romney. He too knows what he has to say – hence his ludicrous invocation of Obama as some kind of alien being. But it doesn’t work. He believes it – since he seems capable of genuinely believing in anything that will win him votes and power. But he doesn’t have the rage to make it work.

While Sullivan’s overall analysis is excellent, he misses the opportunity to nail Romney for what’s been an extraordinary display of his anger. Just because it’s been ineffectual in rallying the base to his cause doesn’t mean it doesn’t exist. This is what passes for vote-winning ‘rage’ in the world of milquetoasts: lying. Absurd, silly in-your-face fictions. Teenage passive-aggression.

Mitt has prosecuted a campaign so notable for lying thoroughly and inartfully, it’s become historic. Steve Benen does the heavy lifting in this area, the bullshit river of Romney. Each Friday, Steve ranks the top ten fabrications of the candidate over the last week. Here’s part of the post from 11 days ago:

Let’s get started:

1. Romney told voters in New Hampshire, “I know what it’s like to worry whether you’re gonna get fired. There were a couple of times I wondered whether I was going to get a pink slip.”

That’s not true.

2. Romney argued in a debate, “[W]hat unfortunately happens is with all the multiplicity of federal programs, you have massive overhead, with government bureaucrats in Washington administering all these programs, very little of the money that’s actually needed by those that really need help, those that can’t care for themselves, actually reaches them.”

This is the exact opposite of the truth.

3. After winning the New Hampshire primary, Romney said of the president, “He lost our AAA credit rating.”

In reality, it was congressional Republicans who were responsible for the downgrade.

4. In the same speech, Romney said of Obama, “He apologizes for America”

Romney’s still lying .  .

This was last Friday:

1. “The president is planning on cutting $1 trillion out of military spending.”

That’s a Romney favorite, but it’s not at all accurate.

2. “This president has opened up no new markets for American goods around the world in his three years, even as European nations and China have opened up 44.”

That’s not even close to being true.

3. “We’ve got a president in office three years, and he does not have a jobs plan yet. I’ve got one out there already and I’m not even president, yet.”

This one actually includes multiple lies . .

Under great pressure to wreak murderous havoc upon the enemy, a decent man can falter. Mitt wants to be heroic, but he can’t manage the blind rage that attends Johnny Republican. This is the anger that piles up as your beliefs get mocked by intelligent, racism- and war-averse folks on the left. Mitt happens to be pretty intelligent and violence-avoiding himself. It’s a problem.

So this is his best rebellious response: reflexive lying. It amounts to barely propaganda dropped on the trenches. That’s not carrying war to the enemy, that’s just being lame. Gingrich will continue to kick his ass until he either starts the bloodletting or quits the race.

But, as you can see, Mitt is comfortable with desperation. That’s the mindset of someone who’d like to chop down a tree by hacking it with a spoon. The irony regarding liars is how quickly they can lie to themselves, so he’ll likely continue on as he’s done. He’ll tell himself he’s making progress, somehow. Don’t bet on him quitting the race until the very latest, probably at the convention.

CNN contributor and conservative radio host Dana Loesch said on her show that she not only thinks the Marines who urinated on dead Taliban soldiers are cool, but she’d be willing to join them.

After playing a news clip describing the video, Loesch said, “I’d drop trou and do it too. That’s me, though. I want a million cool points for these guys.”

Dana Loesch: The Golden Pundit. Can we get a million kewl points for theze guys? OK. Here ya go, cha-ching for you and you and you and you. What now, d00d? Buy some t-shirts that say ‘Wetcha? You betcha.’ Epic. War, the fraternity party. I’m guessing 10% of the Beta Meta Meathead population would gladly put on some Taliban fatigues this weekend and play dead in whatever town Dana’s in.

She wondered why there was any kind of scandal surrounding the incident.

“C’mon people, this is a war,” she said. “Do I have a problem with that as a citizen of the United States? No, I don’t.”

I know virtually nothing about being a military man or fighting in a war. But I know enough to know that pissing on people you shoot, taking video of it and passing it around can get Americans killed. I know soldiers know it’s illegal. And I know better than to hoot it up over something that the military works hard to prevent.

Dana Loesch isn’t just a strutting bimbo. She’s working against the armed forces, their honor and traditions. When it comes to prosecuting a war, I assume they know better than she does.

KABUL — An Afghan soldier who shot dead four French troops has said he did it because of a recent video showing US Marines urinating on the dead bodies of Taliban insurgents, security sources told AFP.

The attack on the soldiers, who were unarmed, came on Friday at a base in eastern Afghanistan and left 15 other French troops wounded, eight of them seriously . .

The report was backed by an intelligence source and another with access to information from the Afghan ministry of defence, both of whom requested anonymity.

“In his initial confessions, he said that he was strongly motivated to kill the soldiers when he saw the video of foreign soldiers urinating on Afghan corpses,” the intelligence source said.

Let me guess, Dana. Now you’re going to be angry.

I love it. I’m going to get sooo drunk tonight. Newt Fucking Gingrich, borderline psycho, Zeus among poodles, has just won the primary that predestines Republicans for the presidential nomination.

Gingrich storms to SC victory, scrambling GOP race
DAVID ESPO and THOMAS BEAUMONT

COLUMBIA, S.C. (AP) — Former House Speaker Newt Gingrich stormed to an upset win in the South Carolina primary Saturday night, dealing a sharp setback to former front-runner Mitt Romney and suddenly scrambling the race for the Republican presidential nomination.

“Thank you, South Carolina!” a jubilant Gingrich swiftly tweeted to his supporters . .

Caviar in root beer smothered in meatloaf. Champagne from a glass simper. God damn.

Doubts creep in as an awkward Mitt Romney tries not to lose the GOP nod
By Niall Stanage | The Hill

What’s wrong with Mitt Romney?

In the early stages of this cycle’s Republican nominating process, the former Massachusetts governor seemed confident and sure-footed. Now he seems awkward and defensive . .

Romney seems to have gone into a defensive crouch, leaving many Republicans feeling like football fans who watch their team move to a ‘prevent defense’ to protect a fourth-quarter lead and dread losing all of it. Their nerves are being jangled even as they acknowledge that outright disaster has so far been averted.

The public’s relationship with Mitt Romney is in dire peril. He looks a sniveling little pussy, and Newt’s assholery courage by comparison. People will only tolerate a nerd-wimp for as long as he’s useful. Mitt Romney seemed useful as long as his riches and systemic insider status represented mystical potential to beat the president.

But Newt Gingrich now makes the case for a dick fight. Stupid sexual politics wins the day. He appeals to Republicans’ guts, which is where their brains reside, neighbor to their obsessed-over and underemployed groins.

Mitt’s a silk and brocade wallpaper version of themselves, and they won’t stand for that. They’ve got nothin’ to beat the black baller with, and Mitt the weak-kneed banker can’t do it either. Newt the Cockgob, OTOH, hater so thoroughly of black fellas he’d make their children clean America’s toilets, will punch Barack’s face. Game on.

`Twas brillig, and the slithy CEO
Did gyre and gimble in the wabe:
All mimsy were the patnerships,
And the LLCs outgrabe.

“Beware the Cap’talist, my son!
Privation bites, and ghettos catch!
Beware McMegan bird, and shun
Ell Bee Oh Bandersnatch!”

He took his Montblanc plume in hand:
Long time the Chomsky foe he sought –
So rested he by keyboards three,
And scribbled ‘while in thought.

AND he then, Fritz Luntz-an struck, did send
The Cap’talist, eyes of flame,
A-whiffling through the web’ral wires,
And, withal, another name!

One, two! Adieu!! The sickness through!
The devil’s something dead!
The poor of commons, as Burmese bugs?
Lo, I call ‘Freedom!’ in its stead!

“And, has thou slain the ‘Cap’talist’?
Penthouse bred, deceptive ploy!
O frabjous day! Callooh! Callay!’
Christian Dior! And Rent-a-Boy!”

`Twas brillig, and the slithy CEO
Did gyre and gimble in the wabe:
All mimsy were the industries,
And the LLCs outgrabe.

After the first two installments of the Newt and Narcissism series (one, two), I thought it might be time to post a timely addendum. There’s a great deal of interest in Newton’s behavior with women, specifically his spouses. So: How does a narcissist behave with his wife or lover?

Marianne Gingrich last night reminded us how Newt cheated on her for a great deal of time. At some point, he approached her with a proposal, probably to solve what he thought was a problem. I should be allowed to keep my mistress, right?

“I just stared at him,” Ms Gingrich, 60, told ABC News. “He said: ‘Callista doesn’t care what I do’. He wanted an open marriage, and I refused”. After she reminded him: “We’ve been married a long time,” he responded: “Yes, but you want me all to yourself,” Ms Gingrich said.

This is classic narcissistic behavior. A narcissist doesn’t see you, or me, or anyone else as a person. He see others as objects. People are meant to serve his purposes in the same way a car or a can opener might.

Yes, he gets caught up in romance and emotion and all the other intoxicating manifestations of intense human relationships. But he is different. Recall, even for healthy folks, that satisfaction presents a formidable hurdle when we’re in love. Sex is a great demonstration of that need. It would be difficult to carry on a romantic relationship without satisfaction of the that type.

A narcissist feels similarly needy for satisfaction, but of adulation. That’s the difference. In psychological terms, this can be objectified as ‘narcissistic supply.’ Guys like Newt are like drug addicts constantly searching for their next score. Who will adore him now? Where can he be worshiped next? This is a drive so taxing and punishing, it can destroy people.

The interview suggests Newt was once doing perfectly well with a wife. But maybe he could get love and romance from two women? That would be even better. He figures he can manage some double-dealing. And for years, he keeps the two separate. But after long having proven himself a stud, it’s time for the two of them to share. This was the gambit Newt tried.

It’s telling that one of his women was willing to tolerate the demand while the other wasn’t. One would continue to attend to him even when he was an openly disrespectful, thoughtless ass. The other wouldn’t. One supply was affirmed, the other was threatened. You can see where he ended up.